We as Mods are at a lose for how to rectify this situation. We have designed threads so that we can share information with like minded Moms. If you choose to read one of said threads that is not in sync with your views you may be offended. The original post that has created this upheaval was in the correct area and was not directed at any one person. The deleted replies were deleted because they were posted after a Mod asked the debating to stop.

We need for everyone to understand that everyone has differing views on things. We are all adults here and if you find something offensive, please let the poster know and work it out. But unless someone says something directly to you (i.e. Judith says "Lisa is abusing Mia because she lets her sleep with a blanket" as a very broad example) than you need to assume that the comment was not directed at you

I hate to think that anyone would leave as a result, but we know that everyone needs a break sometimes.. Please PM me or any of the other Mods if you have suggestions on how to handle things of this nature.

ETA that posts were also deleted on the reason that they were in support of Vaccines in the wrong thread

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Well said, Lisa.

Ladies, I've been thinking of what's going on and thought of this:

Many of us started visiting here when we wanted to find out more info about getting pg, so we were all on the same page. We were giving/getting advice on OPK's, charting, Bd'ing etc. I mean how many of us tell our IRL friends when we BD? That bond brought us together.

Then, when we were pg together, we had the bond of sharing stories of our pg and going through similar experiences again. M/S, mood swings, strange cravings are things that we could all relate to and not feel alone.

And then, we gave birth which is a miraculous experience. Up until this time, we all had pretty similar experiences "together." We sorta forgot that we're individuals with various backgrounds, cultures, values, etc. Raising a child is a personal thing on which no two people will raise their children exactly alike.

So, we've come to a point where we've noticed differences in parenting. With differences it is not a right or wrong answer, and we're merely sharing our own experiences with our children. I hope we can think of what's going on in this light so offenses won't happen and we can continue the unique bond that we've created.

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I've pretty much kept my mouth shut and ignored this spat, other than in PM's to certain people, but things have gotten to the point where I have to speak up.


So here's MY view of things.
There have been lots of comments made about feelings being hurt. Comments about how people are feeling attacked, and how people are feeling like they can't speak openly.
You CAN.
The majority of us (I'd say anyone who is feeling any sort of emotion toward this hoo-ha), have become FRIENDS with each other. When you are just aquaintances with someone, you keep your mouth shut. You act polite, but you stay quiet. When you are FRIENDS with someone, you speak up. Sometimes you might inadvertantly hurt that person's feelings. It's not that you are trying to hurt them (no one wants to hurt a friend), but you feel comfortable enough to be open about how you feel, and sometimes that may not be in line with how the other person feels. So sometimes, hurt happens. Not on purpose, and certainly not because of a lack of valuing the person's thoughts or feelings.

Before, everyone was polite, because nobody really "knew" each other. Now we do. So, no, we may not be in 100% agreement all the time. We may have different viewpoints, and we may even SHARE those viewpoints with one another, and get different responses from different people.

If your feelings are hurt, if you're feeling emotional at all about this whole thing, congratulations-- it means you're "in". Those of us hurting are feeling that way because we LIKE each other so much. Because we are honest-to-goodness friends with each other. If we could all sit in a room together right now, we'd be yelling, and crying, and hugging. But we can't do that. So we need to do it in our heads.

It's time to move on. Those that left (my theory is they aren't really gone; how do you just pick up and go completely? I couldn't if I tried) need to come back. I think at this point in time we're all pretty ticked off. I know I am. Now it's time for us to rebuild.

Maybe we need a good girly movie to watch together. We need a big bowl of popcorn (lots of bowls, fat-free for the dieters, Kettle for the, well, for me ... organic for those who want it...), and we all need to sit and enjoy the movie and move on!
Okay, okay, I realize THAT's not gonna happen. So instead let's just pretend it did, okay? I'm tired of being sad.


P.S. If you really do want to watch a movie and talk about it later, watch Dan in Real Life. I just saw it recently and LOVED it and would love to hear what my FRIENDS think about it!!!!!

P.P.S. Did anyone notice I used the word "hoo-ha"? I didn't mean it in the vajayjay way, obviously.

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Sarah-I think you said it perfectly!!

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Sarah, Pam, Bina, Lisa~

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