I think around here I've always seen between 4 and 7 as 'the window' for the epi.

For me, natural childbirth is just how it is done. It's a concept that I was raised on. Literally, when I was way too young to understand anything else about my body as a female, I knew it was for growing and nursing a baby. I saw my first live birth when I was 5 -- I was taking care of my upstairs neighbors son, because her best friend was across the hall giving birth, which is where my mother was as well. I knew there was hollering involved. My mother was a La Leche League Leader (international organization dedicated to support of breastfeeding) and a Lamaze teacher.

I've had people tell me, 'oh, you just don't know, you'll change your mind'. (Real nice thing to say to someone who is desperate for a baby, right?) But I tell people it would be like me, at 29, suddenly deciding that I will walk on my hands instead of on my feet. To me, it's how my body works.

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Gem-When I found out we were pg last month my cousin who has been more like my mother told me all about La Leache League. I never had heard of it. Now I've heard of it within 3 weeks.

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That's funny! Like when you hear the name of a country you did know, or break up with a boyfriend, suddenly the names are everywhere you look.

The organization has a book called 'The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding'. I think it is probably on it's 9th publication by now. It is generally accepted as the 'bible' of breastfeeding. I recommend it for anyone.

I know this wasn't a topic about breastfeeding, LOL!. It's just all tied up together for me, i.e., different birthing forms can affect the beginning of nursing, etc.

www.lalecheleague.org

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Gem-thank you.

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Gem, I breastfed both of my girls for their first year of life ( a little longer than a year actually) and I loved it. I do have to say though that although I know there are a few differant issues that may impeed on nursing for the first little bit, I truely believe that whatever kind of birth experience you have, you can have a successful breastfeeding relationship. When my first one was born she had to go to the NICU for 2 days because she has a mild form of Spina Bifida, anyways I could not breastfeed very often in that timeframe. They gave her bottles and I was really worried because I had read the Womanly art of breastfeeding and with that knowledge I was sure she was never going to be able to breastfeed. They also had given her a pacifier in the NICU, so needless to say I was a wreck, not only was my baby in the NICU but now I had it in my head that there was no way I was going to be able to breastfeed. Well she got out and we had a great time of it she latched on right away and everything was perfect from there on out.
With my second one I had an easy birth expeirence and she was layed right on my chest and we had a much rougher time with the begining of feeding. I even had a nurse that was trained by the La Leche league tell me I was doing it all wrong and there was no way she was getting any milk. DH finally asked this nurse how long she has breastfed and come to find out she didnt have any kids yet so all she was telling me came from a book. DD #2 was nursing like a champ by day 2 or 3

I guess this whole post is to say that even in the worst of birth expeirences you can have a great breastfeeding relationship and it makes me nervous when I hear people tell woman that the birth expeirence and the breastfeeding one are closely tied together because it gives a lot of woman a huge mental block that can be really hard to overcome. I had a girlfriend whose daughter spent time in the NICU because she inhaled meconium and my friend was such a wreck she never even tried nursing because she was sure it wouldnt work.

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mom2girls-I have such a fear that I won't be able to nurse or my future baby won't be able to latch on. I have heard that once your child is born to try and nurse right away. Do they mean once the baby is laid on your chest? i so want to nurse and can't wait for the opportunity to do so.

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Lisa~
That was an encouraging story. Thank you.

When my DD was born, I had a difficult time breast feeding at first. She didn't want to latch on. What worked for me is the nurse who came out to my house a few days later, put a drop of formula on my nipple. Once DD got the taste of formula in her mouth from that area, she immediately latched on.

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Marcia, I wouldnt worry to much about the baby being able to latch on because there are some really great tricks out there to get them to do it (like Regina just said) I think bf is the best gift we can give our kids (and ourselves) Dont worry if you cant do it right away, it will happen and the baby is not hungary for the first little bit anway. My sister has three that she nursed for 18mth each and had all three c-section so it was like 3 hours after birth for all of them and she never had a single problem.

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Marcia, the biggest hurdle to bf is your own fears and anxiety. A woman's body is made to bf, and like mom said, there are some good tricks. I didn't bf my DD right away, but a few hours later & we didn't have a prob. I continued to bf for nearly 2 years. I agree w/ mom that the birth experience isn't necessarily tied to bf.

I also think it's also really important to have an idea of what u want for urself in delivery but not to be overly attached to the idea of a perfect birth experience (wether it's thru natural birth or w/ an epidural). Labor and delivery--it's just so tricky and unpredictable. Every birth and every baby is diff. The important thing is to end up w/ a healthy baby & a healthy mom.

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Agreed, there is a way, regardless of the birthing experience, or any problems.

I think the biggest trouble a lot of mothers inexperienceD with nursing have is lack of support (like your nurse who didn't have hands-on experience). It used to be your own mother, grandmother, sisters, cousins, all who had nursed, all around to teach you about your new baby. I used to get really frusterated when people told me they stopped nursing because they got engorged, or because the milk dried up, or things like that. Usually such simple solutions. But I gave up the breastfeeding cruisade a long time ago...

I feel kinda soap-box-ie, but I don’t mean to be. Old habit, I guess. I guess it was my way of showing the world that I wasn't less just because I hadn't given birth yet, you know? It's a hard thing to battle sometimes. There's a part of me looking forward to my first child simply so that I can dump all that old stuff out of my head – all that old yearning and jealousy, and ‘knowledge-and-experience-morphing-into-self-righteousness’ stuff. It’s such a heavy weight on my soul.

The last time AF came, when I was upset, I asked DH if he knew what he wanted to be when he grew up when he was three. He said no. I said I did. I wanted to be a mommy. I’ve spent my whole life waiting for my turn. There’s a lot of anger and stuff, jealousy, longing, disappointment, excitement. God, there’s just so much stuff. I don’t know how this turned into venting. Never know when it’s gonna come out, I guess.

MIT - the nursing after delivery thing has do do with bonding, of course, and mostly that 'quiet alert' stage within that short period after birth. But don't worry, it doesn't mean you have to grab her while she/he's still slimy or you've missed it. My brain is remembering something about twenty minutes to an hour being 'normal' for that alert stage? Anyone remember for sure what the norm is?

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Gem I think you are right on about how woman now have no support from family members. My mom had nursed us all, but for a very short period of time and my MIL was the same. When I finally got comfortable with it I knew I would never do formula but I had a lot of preassure to do formula for the "just in case"
I was nursing right after DD1 turned 1 and my dad asked me three times in like a half hour when I was going to wean her. I kind of snapped and told him it was none of his bussiness, so I can totally understand your passion with breastfeeding I feel the same way too.

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Ditto. It's annoying how people try to pass their own expectations onto ur life. My mom bottle-fed all of us (4 kids) & MIL bottle-fed hers (5) & they had no idea what to do when I opted to BF. They would try to sneak DD glucose water & mashed bananas b/cuz they were convinced that I was starving my baby, even thou she was a roly poly She and MIL bought me a ton of bottles & pacifiers that weren't used even once. I had to donate all the formula & cereal they would buy me. I think part of the problem was that they wanted to be able to feed her & that they had convinced themselves formula was better to justify their own decisions to bottle-feed. I wanted to scream.

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Gem, having a baby doesn't make a woman a mother. U sound to me like u are a mom in ur soul. Ur baby just isn't here yet.

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Very well said Carol.

Gem someday very soon you are going to get your oppurtunity to breastfeed and you will be giving your baby the best gift ever.

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Thanks, guys. You made me cry. {{{hugs}}}


Gawd, I love this place.

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Again, I have decided to revive an old thread. No one has posted here in a few years, but there are a lot of us preggos that are getting to the point where we are thinking about our birthing process. I started our lamaze class last night (loved it!), Jo goes to hers this weekend, and 3 of you are closing in on the third trimester, which inevitably means thinking about birth. I truly believe that the only way you can have the birth you desire is to KNOW what you want and expect going into it (and, of course, be willing to change your mind as the situation changes). So it is good to hear different peoples birth processes.

From all of you birth veterans, I would love to hear about your birth decisions, and also anything that you thought really helped you with pain relief during the labor. I am going to try and avoid an epi, and would love to hear anything that you thought made the birth more comfortable or relaxing (even if you did have an epi).

And from the other preggos, I think this is a great place to discuss what you are reading/learning in classes, writing a birthplan, or any fears or questions or ideas about how you want your birth to go. I have some ideas of how I would like things to go, but as of yet, I don't really know how to make those ideas a reality!

Edit: PLEASE DO NOT INCLUDE YOUR HORROR STORIES ABOUT LABOR OR CHILDBIRTH. IF YOU MUST TELL THEM, PLEASE WAIT UNTIL WE REACH THE BABY SIDE: IT IS NOT HELPFUL TO FREAK OUT THE PREGNANT WOMEN! Lets keep this thread positive, so that our thoughts remain positive!

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KRISSY