Rac- WOW! That's impressive work!!

I am so depressed today because my DH flew to Chicago this morning for a stupid work dinner that he has to host and won't be back until tomorrow. I really miss him for some weird reason. Ever get in those moods where you don't want to be alone? Annabelle is helping me somewhat, but I am just feeling lonely.

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Renee~ Thanks for checking in on us!

Jo~ YES, I get in those moods too. Sorry you are feeling lonely. ((hugs))

Bec~ Those pics are beautiful!

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Tina - Either J-lo is pregnant or homegirl has a SERIOUS thyroid problem or a giant tumor growing in her belly. Cause she had a very obvious belly bump. I told DH that she's is the sexiest pregnant woman I have ever seen. She would do a play on words through out the concert insinuating she was pregnant. For example she would say things like...this is a very special time for Marc and I and we thank you for coming out and celebrating with us and then she would pause and start giggling and then say because you know this is our first tour together.

Snowie - Rumor has it she did an IVF. My ex's sister went to school with her and they are still friends, when I first heard the rumor I called her and she had the nerve to tell me "you know I can't tell you Betsy" like WTH!!! Anyway I told Eileen to please please please if it was true about the IVF that to please tell her that we really need a spokesperson on the issue of infertility. That all these stars have their twin babies and then act like it was "all worth it". F that. I want to hear from their heart what needs to be done to make infertility testing easier for any couple struggling with infertility. Every single time a high profile person brushing IF under the carpet I type a letter to the editor of the magazine, because it INFURIATES ME that they make it so unimportant. Or like they magically forget about those who struggle to get pregnant. I have yet to get a response. But I still write the letters.

Rebecca - Thanks for talking to Tammy - I like your siggy with the furbabies. I want to do one in memory of Vanilla. So the big toe? Carlos has a foot fetish which really irritates me, I tolerate it every once in a while, I may have to ask him to do me a favor next cycle. I showed him the glass work, he absolutely loved it. very pretty

Lauren - I hope you call to get the u/s I'm curious to see what's going on in there. Hope the foot massage does the trick. Now working at Relax the BAck, I do two massages a day in the chair, I'm hoping that helped this month. Which reminds me...

Rebecca should I stop doing the massage chairs post O?

Heidi - I'm sorry about the temp drop, I was really hoping to buy those drugs from you.

Michelle - Anything you can do naturally even if you are avoiding would be a good thing. Would you temp during your break? When I took my break in the summer which at the time was supposed to be the end for us, I temped to avoid. And I still post about non TTC stuff, we still have our regular lives outside of TTC.

Renee - Carlos is in limbo mode. and I'm leaving him there until after the holidays, then I'll bring the pressure on again. ARe you still working your night hours??

Jo - sorry you are loneyly. =( I don't even like it when DH gets home around 8 when he plays soccer, it's like I don't know what to do with myself.

The concert was awesome. I wouldn't rank it among one of the best concerts I've seen. But it was pretty good.

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Betsy yeah I'm still working night. I agree j-lo is definately preggo I saw pics from th concert if she isn't then something isn't right lol

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Betsy - Yep, the big toe. The other spots are..... just below the ankle for the ovaries and the top of the ankle joint for the uterus and tubes (I think I got them straight). Those are the same spots for Carlos' reproductive organs, too. I don't think the massage chairs will hurt anything post O. They're not pushing on any major veins or arteries to the uterus and they're not interfering with those spots on the feet, either. Massage during the first trimester isn't bad like everyone thinks as long as you avoid certain spots. Using the massage chair can help to reduce stress among other things, so I'd say, keep at it. If you remember, Dana had her first massage shortly after she conceived. All is well there (and did you see her post about her u/s?? She's having TWINS!!).

So, when do you get more info about a trip to Pittsburgh?

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Betsy-Amen about the stars who get pg using infertility treatments and then don't speak about it. It pisses me off as well. Why not talk about it and why keep it such a big secret? It just means you are human like the rest of us except they have the money to do all these treatments so may be that's why it means so little to them. But for us normal folks who spend every last dollar we have to get pg when it finally happens can truly charish it.

I was hoping to see those meds to you too but AF finally made her appearance this morning.

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Steph - I may borrow your SH from time to time! Not actually borrow your SH, but the term "SH"!!!

Jo - I hate seeing "baby" things at craft shows that I saw years before. I always think "well maybe next year at this time......." They always have such cute baby things.

Rebecca - Those pictures are so neat!

Well I had fun Saturday night, I actually got up twice for karaoke. Not by myself of course, didn't want to drive everyone out of the bar! I sang with 2 other girls.

I talked to my sister-in-law yesterday, she went into one of the cafe's in our town to pick up breakfast. There was a man sitting at the counter, talking very loudly, saying "did you hear about that psychotic kid who killed himself?" Then he went on & on saying what a f*ucked up guy he was and blah blah blah. Well she turned to him & said "That was my brother-in-law and maybe you should watch what you say because you don't know who could be around, and he wasn't psychotic, he just had some problems." Well the guy said "Why don't you mind your own f*ucking business." So she left. Well it got back to the guy's mom & step-dad, who go to that cafe and eat there all the time. The owner knows them and even sent flowers to the wake. So the mom went in there and said to that guy "I really don't appreciate you saying those things about my son, he did have problems, but that doesn't give you the right to talk about things you don't know." She said some other things about losing her son and how she didn't wish that upon anyone." Well the guy looked at her and said "Your a f*cking b*itch." Her husband got in his face and then they left. Isn't that insane? The guy in the cafe is almost 60 years old! I told DH that last night, and he said don't worry about, I'll take care of it. I'm sure sometime this week, DH will be in there looking for that guy.

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betsabeth- the only problem with that is that i ovulate on different days. some months i dont. im starting to think i have one ovary that isnt, and one that is. ill either use a diaphram one week of the month or make my hubby use a condom one week a month, although hed rather go without at that point. ill call family planning today and find out my options

Good morning ladies! Juan and I had a nice weekend. Busch Gardens was so much fun, even though I cried after we went through the haunted maze. Seriously, I screamed through the whole thing and then once we got outside I just started to cry. Why am I such a wuss?! The good thing about BG is they let you drink beer while you're walking around the park! We had such a good time. Then we went to the outlets yesterday and I reigned myself in pretty good. Only spent $73!

Karyn - That's horrible! The things people say. Jeez. Is your DH a rough and tumble kind of guy? Maybe you should have a nice steak in the fridge on reserve for tending to a black eye?

Betsy - So glad you guys had a nice time at the concert.

Lauren, hope you get some answers and ovulate soon! I know how frustrated you are.

Heidi, I'm sorry about AF, but I have a lot of hope for you with the injectibles.

Snowie, I'm sorry about the breakdown, but glad that your HSG is all clear and you and DH are back on the TTC train. Hopefully it will be a short journey for you.

Rebecca, what ever happened to that employee who was never showing up?

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Emily - Funny you ask about him. Right now he's officially under investigation with employee relations. We finally got the release info from his doctor. His release date was 9/11 and the doctor wrote 'however, employer refused release'. Uh, how the heck can we refuse something that we never received??? So the problem child called me last Monday saying that wasn't the 'date' they told him. I wasn't allowed to say much since my ER rep is working on the case. It's just a bunch of lies and he isn't keeping them all straight and will end up with no job plus he will get a bill in the mail for the short term pay that he received and any $$ that we paid toward his health insurance while he's been out. Stupid, stupid, stupid. OH and he mentioned about his FML being denied. I told him it was because he didn't turn his paperwork in on time. He blamed it on the doctor! I'm sorry, but it's not the doctor's responsibility to make sure YOUR papers are submitted! Idiot.

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Karyn-That is the crappiest thing I've ever heard. Some people have no tact and are complete idiots.

Em-I'm so glad you had a good time with DH.

Well my u/s, b/w and learning the meds will be Wed AM. I think I'm going to call in for the day. I'm really struggling today with this. I'm angry as hell that my body won't cooperate. In the last 7 months we've had what I feel prefectly timed BD and 5 months used clomid and still have nothing to show for it. I was excited to move but now it's kind of hitting me that once again I have to move onto another treatment because my body won't do it on its own.

I'm also feeling kind of sad that these are our last 3 months of trying with medical help. Once we do the IUI our coverage will stop so anything further will be out of pocket. So I feel like the pressure is really on for the injectables or IUI to work.

So I'm sitting here with the office door closed and hvaing my meltdown over lunch. Sorry to be "Debbie Downer". I HATE MY BODY.

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Lauren-sent you a PM about meds.

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Heidi~ I pm'ed you back!

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Heidi- We'll have to compare doctor's advice. I go tomorrow afternoon at 2pm.

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Heidi-I'm sorry this is so hard on you. I wish there were a magic wand I could wave and make all this IF crap go away for all of us. I hope the appt brings some positivity back to this whole thing. But for now, all I can offer you is this gret big (((((hug)))))

Em-Thanks, I hope it'll be a short journey as well. When is your appt?

Jo-Good luck at your appt tomorrow! Can't wait to hear how it goes!

Betsy-I totally agree. I think celebs should stop perpetuating all the IF myths and rally for all who are going through it. Like Brooke Shields.

Renee-Thanks for checking in on us! Your boys are getting big!

So anyone who has had an HSG ever spot after BD? DH and I abstained the night of and the day after but the night after that we got it on and I started spotting. Like old blood though. So I called my dr and she wants to inspect me tomorrow. Anyone else around here getting tired of getting their girly parts constantly poked and prodded by all the wrong people?!

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Snowie-Thank you so much. I appreciate it. I actually had a couple of days of brown spotting afterwards. And DH and I think actually BD'd that night hoping wiht the clear tubes and all something would happen. I think I even posted about it afterwards because I was worried but nothing came of it. So I'm sure you are fine.

Jo-Good luck with the appt tomorrow. I'm anxious to hear what the doctor has to say.

I came home and continued my meltdown. DH immediately knew something was wrong. So I told him AF arrived and I was just really disappointed. So he hugged me and made me feel better. Then had a glass of wine. I know I'll be fine. Just tired of my body not working the way it's supposed to. Frustrated when I look at other people's charts and we have the same BD and temp, ovulation and nothing happens and someone else with the same can get pg.

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Heidi~ It is ok to be angry. Get really angry and then turn that anger into determination and committment for this to work!

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