JJ~ I think this is the first time i have read the ttc thread in months, but I wanted to jump in and comment to you...
I dont know your story, and if you'll fill me in it may help... how old are you? what is your fsh? have you done any iuis? ivfs? how long have you been ttc?

It is a big step for a doctor to suggest using DE. I was heartbroken when I was told that I needed them.... but after 5iuis and 3 ivf cycles, I just wanted to be a mom. That simple. For me, that was more important than my genetics. Anyway, I KNOW it isnt an easy decision. Fill me in a bit and I will be glad to help if I can.

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Mary - You didn't waste your $13 on the opks. You usually surge a day or so before you O and it's only cd9. You have time. Keep testing and temping. I like the fact that your temps are pretty steady. I always think that is a good sign of level hormones.

JJ - Have you thought about doing injectibles?? They're more potent than clomid since they are the actual hormones that the body is supposed to create rather than a pill that acts on the hypothalamus. You may get a better response from those. I think it's a bit early to think you have to go with DE or adoption. My RE doesn't consider a failed treatment until after three or four cycles of one protocol. Maybe give clomid another shot, you may need a higher dosage or ask your RE about injectibles. They're much more expensive than five little pills, though. I don't know if your insurance covers fertility related treatment.

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Good morning! I'm glad i'm not alone on the porn issue!!

Rebecca~I totally agree with you. I think its disrespectful and degrading to women. I have low self-esteem and when I catch him looking at it I think that i'm not good enough. He gets mad and says thats not it. But still thats how I feel. I'm perfectly capable of satisfying him. So why porn? The counselor said its cause of my background/past as a child. Could be...he gets the text messges too. He has pics of boobs on his phone right now that i'm about to delete. Why save that?

Mary~Rebecca is right...you're only on CD9. Might be a little early. I don't get a + until CD15. When my OPK's are + my test line is way darker than the control line. But I use the answer ones that are $20 for like 20 sticks. I have heard those are more sensitive..... 97.3 is about what my temp is pre o and I also get O pain. Mine is not cramps though....its a pain! Like my insides are swollen and twisted up. Usually lasts a day and is gone. G/L

Lindy~I'm glad things are better! Sometimes its easier to get your feelings out not face to face. I used to write mine down. DH and I rarely fight anymore, but when we've had arguements. I get the silent treatment for a bit, then we go to work and email each other! Sounds stupid, but its worked out that way. I can't believe I guessed it! That just shows you're not the only one that has this issue

Ok, so last night when I went to bed my left side and the middle of my belly was hurting. Not a cramp, but a pain. Feels like my insides are bruised or swollen. Ever since i've started meds I get this when AF is here. Never had it before meds. Today is only CD3 too......I start Femara tonight. I'm excited to seee my u/s to see how I respond compared to clomid. Last night working out i've come to the conclusion.....i'm going to ask for the Lap if i'm not pregnant in 3 months. I'm soooooooooo scared to have it done, but my gut says it has to be done

Hope everyone has a good Saturday!

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AF is here Oh well at least I was expecting her and I'm glad she didn't wait until Monday's Day to show. I have an appointment for CD3 b/w on Monday morning so thats perfect. I'm going to call Monday to set up the HSG too... hopefully Friday. I really hope the CD3 b/w tells me something because lets face it my temps are far from flat even vaginally so I think my hormone levels are off.

Lindy - I had guessed it was porn too... it is so much more common than you'd think! DH and I had an issue about it maybe around 5 yrs when he was out of work for a few weeks. He's so rarely home alone and was supposed to be job hunting... but when I went to clear out the cookies it was all porn stuff. I was so upset because I've always been fairly flexible about us using porn/toys together but had stressed that I didn't like him doing it alone. But its just one of those things that you have to move on from. For his bday a couple of years ago we did a photo shoot where I dressed up in all sorts of outfits so hopefully now when he looks at pictures to beat it, they're at least pictures of me.

Deanna - I think its good that you're not ruling out the lap. Hopefully you won't need to do it but it could be just the treatment you need. I'm glad you found the IC - I've left them in overnight before but a few hours should do it.

Mary - hang in there. I'm sure that positive OPK is right around the corner. It can be hard to distinguish CM from lube and semen but just give it your best guess. I read somewhere that if you drop it in a glass of water semen will float but CM will sink - not sure if thats true (Rebecca?) I've gone through different stages through this process - in the beginning I had the nursery all planned out, then I stopped and just this month I started again. There's something so exciting yet sad to be trying to choose a crib when you're not pg yet!!

JJ - I too don't understand how they've suddenly become so negative about your situation. It sounds like you've come to terms with it and will do whatever it takes... I just hope that they haven't thrown in the towel too early on using your eggs. I hope you get answers even if you have to consult a 2nd RE.

Mel - I have to confess I never knew what peas and rice was either but I thought I was a dummy LOL!

Ashley - if the lucky sticks work for you I'll take one!

Steph - too funny. I try to be more adventurous for DH but helicopter is one game we haven't played yet!!

Claire - I'm not sure about the S/A either but it doesn't sound good. I hope Betsy can help. You'll probably have to have him retested in a few months though and hopefully it was just this one batch.

Bina - thanks... I was really hoping to join you on the other side but maybe next month! Hopefully my doctor can shed some light on the varying LP but since she doesn't seem to put much stock in temping I doubt she will. We'll see...

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Rebecca/Lauren/Irene~Those are my thoughts exactly, we haven't tried ANYTHING else yet. And that's why I don't get why they want to go to donor eggs right away. I don't know if she just knows that with my test results why waste time and money on other options, but who knows. I feel like I should try something stronger than clomid first. Whenever I ask a question, I don't really get an answer. That's why I want a second opinion. I'll stick with this place for now because I think they'll do another round of clomid and I don't want to waste time, but I do want another opinion. And I'm pretty sure that if I end up liking a new re more and they still say DE, I will have the new re do that. I hope what I typed makes sense

Lauren~Thank you for talking to me here. I only started posting in October, but I was reading before that and I've been following your story. I really look up to you and I hope and pray that you get your baby soon.
Anyway, here's my history...I'm 33. DH and I started ttc in October of '06. I got pg relatively quickly in January, but in June our son was stillborn (I was 26 weeks). I had lots of testing done on me and an autopsy done on him, but they couldn't find a cause. The placenta was very clotted which is what did it, but they don't know why. They told me to wait three months for my body to heal and then we could ttc again. They told me that if I didn't get pg within five months, then I would be considered to have secondary infertility and I should go see an RE. So that is what happened. I haven't had much fertility testing done. My FSH was 10.9, estradiol 18.6, and prolactin 14.3. DH's test came up good, except for low volume. That's why we were going to do iui. She then did a clomid challenge test, where I had cd3 bloodwork done, took clomid days 5-9, and then more blood on cd10. I failed that, and that was when she said I had diminished ovarian reserve and needed donor eggs. However, then she did an u/s and I had 1 follie, so she said my eggs are going bad, but not bad yet. That was last month. This month I did clomid and was going to do iui. But I never got my surge. An u/s yesterday showed 2 follies at 7 and I'm on cd15 I think. So then she was back on to donor eggs. She also told me I have small ovaries, which is a sign of dor I guess. That's it. No other testing or stronger drugs or anything. Personally I think I should try that first, before going on to de. I'm not sure who asked, but my insurance doesn't pay for any of this. Luckily we had money set aside for this, just in case. I think that's everything I know so far...Thanks for taking the time to read this.

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JJ~ It sounds like you have been through a lot. I am so sorry.
I would definitely try some other things first. I think DE is a blessing, but it is a big decision to make. Your fsh is on the high end of normal, but not bad. BUT, I have learned form my experiences that there is truly no test that tells you what your ovarian reserve is. All of my testing was great... no suspiscion that there would be any problems... But after using the max of stims for 3 ivf cycles, and having a poor response, that is what they diagnosed me with. Also when you do IVF they can actually look at your eggs, which gives them a better idea of their quality. It can all be very expensive... we dont have insurance coverage either. We did as much as we could with ivf, and decided we couldnt "waste" any more money on my eggs. Feel free to pm me anytime, if I dont respond over here. I just dont read up much. ((hugs))

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Ok, people, Seriously. If you have to IM me, What the heck is the helicopter thing. I keep trying to picture it and it all comes out looking painful in my mind! LOL

Rac-Thanks for PM Betsy. I keep looking this up on the net, and all I can find is that the morphology is a very controversial thing in the science community. There are two was to test this and the one they used for DH requires 14%. I've talked to a few women who got pg with low morph. So, I just don't know. I was SO excited when the guy at clinic said he looked good. Maybe I should call him back, but I have a feeling this is what you go to an RE for is the analysis of the results. We just got the s/a, really, we don't have a Dr. to talk to about it.

JJ- I'm glad you aren't giving up and deciding to get a second opinion.

Irene-boooo to AF. Sorry, hun. You didn't really want a snooty little frog baby anyhow, right?

Deanna~ Sorry about the pains. I had the lap (2nd) almost 1 month ago, and there is nothing to fear, really. I think having the answers is worth the pain. And really the pain is not too bad-from the lap. And now having gone through O and AF I'm starting to see how much pain I was really in pre-lap. If you have other questions about it, you can totally PM me.

Mel-Oh I get it now! LOL duh!

Ashley-giving the porn to MIL is friggin priceless. I LOVE that! Wooohooo, you go girl.

I am at such different ends of the porn issue. I work with all men, and I'm a plumber. So I'm real used to seeing the girly calendars in the shop and finding the gross mags in our work trucks. I don't understand if they are wacking it on lunch break or what, and when I ask them they don't answer me at all. From being around men, I understand that part of their culture in how they relate to each other is looking at chicks. ugg, neaderthals. But, after the first time I found DH's stash and had a complete meltdown over it-well, that was the end of HIS porn in this house. He is so computer illiterate, I don't have to worry about that. I think sometimes that I like porn more than him. Can't believe I said that. But as a together-spice-things-up or motivation for BD thing, ya know? I would lose it if I had to deal with it as much as some of you girls. I wish I could be that secure.

Hope everyone is having a great weekend. DH and I went to get a card for my mother for mother's day. Blah. Tell me, why doesn't hallmark make a mother's day card that says:" you were a crappy mom, a drunk and you've never been there for me-but I got you a card anyway."?

Anyone else a little blue over mothers' day? I found a "mother-to-be" card and got it for my cousin, but was a little jealous, too.

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OMG, LOL, I missed this thread since I made the helicopter comment. ROFL! Well, if y'all haven't played it, I guarantee you that your DH has played it with himself when he was younger and trying to figure out what it can do. You just grab near the base and swing it around like a helicopter. LMAO! We were ROFL! Those things are a lot more durable than most guys let on. OMG, I'm cracking up.

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Aw Steph I'm disappointed... I thought you'd be spinning around on top of him LOL!

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Here is my update. We are way better than the other day. I have forgiven him completely. I guess reading everyones posts it made me realize I am not the only one that has gone through this. I actually hugged him and gave him a quick peck on the lips. Progress right. I am so ready to get it on. I have been since the night everything happend bc we were going to that night. I guess I may put out sooner than I wanted to but I think I got my point across. I hadn't kissed, touched, said I love you, or sat next to him since the other day. I also slept with a pillow between us and on the edge of the bed. I do feel way better today. Thanks to everyone. I love you guys. I hope everyone has had a Super Saturday! To everyone on here Happy Mother's Day. I know some of you may not be yet............but you are getting it from me anyways bc, you all are wonderful women. Have a Satisfying Sunday!

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Lindy
"Let's kick some fat butt!"

Lindy - I'm glad you're feeling better about things and you realize that you're so not alone!

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Morning ladies,

The helicoptor? I'll be asking DH, that's too funny not to!

And Clarie, about the Mother's day card, with MIL I totally feel ya.

Well looks like I might just be Oing ing the next few days, Hip Hop Hooray! Now the pressure is really on. Since my temp went to 97.5 this morning, and I've had some slight pressure/cramps.

Funny/yet irratating story then I'm off to do the dance.

My cousin, same age as I am, has two kids and lives with her Mom. About two months ago, I told my Mom she had to be pregnant she was getting a buldge and it wasn't soft fat. Well two weeks ago, the Mother kept asking the daughter, "Are you pg?" "No, Mom" Well the Mom insisted a Dr. appointment. Yep, your pregnant and your due next week! Although the situation irratates me, no prenatal, no dr. visits, and you get to have a child! WTH! We have the joy of seeing her and little Garison today at a Mother's day lunch. Yes she just had the Csection on Friday, and got her tubes tied. There are so many things that I would love to throw up at the mouth at her, but I have been trying to be a better person lately. So I won't but. It's still very upsetting. How can some people be so F STUPID!!!!!

Happy flippin Mother's Day! Ok I guess I'm not dealing with this as well as I would like to play off. Boo whoo!

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[center]Mary

Mary - That blows my mind! How do you go 8 months and NOT know you're pg especially after having 2 kids already? Amazing.

So, did you get your positive opk yet??

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with these silly answer strips how would you know? Just kidding, well to me this morning the control line and test line were very similar in color, but here's the funny part. So with the + and my temp up, I go in to DH with all the tricks up my sleeve, "No, not right now, my stomach" Let me back you up to last night when DH and I went to The Thai Place for dinner and DH insisted that he order the HOT, well there's only one hotter and that's Thai hot and they don't even let you order that. I warned him before he ordered, but oh no, I don't know how much heat he can handle. Needless to say, DH was bathroom ridden for a long time this morning. So when I got turned down, all I could do was cry. So it's finally here and finally time and your too sick!! Oh well not that much sympathy considering how much I warned him. He said tonight's a foresure. I hope hes right and I hope we won't be too late. O wait I just tested again let me go check it. NO!!! What the heck? I surely didn't already surge and it's done? Well I did have a lot of Sprite in the last hour at Ryan's steak house, while I completely stuffed my face. Kind of feeling sorry for myself, what a loser! I'll probably test again later and BD tonight with the seed, and hope my temp goes up again tonight.

Hope everyone is having a great day!