I just reread what I wrote and I wanted to say sorry, Gem, if I sounded like one of those "enough about you, let's talk about me" types. I really am not like that, and I brought up my situation to let you know that I totally understand what you are going through. Sometimes I have a hard time expressing myself. Although your situation is different than what I've been through - the effect on you is similar to how I have been affected by what has happened to me. Am I making any sense - or am I digging myself in deeper? Anyway, I wish you the best, and thanks for sharing your story.