And here's one from her livejournal right after Christmas (first time I'd spoken to her since last summer)

"Back after a few days in San Antonio with the folks. It was really nice to hang out with them. My mom and I are getting along better and better as the years go by. The distance doesn't seem to hurt, either. Plus the fact that my sister's still not really speaking to either of us.

It was strange being shunned by my siblings. They're both still pissed. I don't quite know what to do with them; all my instincts are screaming for me to reach out to them. I'm their big sister. That's what I've always done. But I think the right thing to do is just let things be for a while. I honestly don't think I'm in the wrong, objectively, with my actions towards either. So I'm not quite ready to be the bigger person and take the first step."

Did you see that line I bolded? WTF is wrong with her? How could she take my misery and even joke (or not -- that wasn't a joke) about how it's benefitting her? GOD she's so self-centered. She thinks she's been this 'big-sister'. She's been gone from San Antonio for good for like, ten years. When she had her nervous breakdown and left Boston University her junior year, she moved in WITH ME, in my apartment, when I was 18. Big sister? Yeah, okay. Sister, fine. But glorifying herself as this older sibling who takes care of the youngers...please. And it pisses me off. By the way, how the **** would she know if she was in the wrong or not -- it's the thing I couldn't get through her head last summer; she had NO CLUE what I was dealing with or feeling, and I didn't have to tell her, couldn't get through her head that some things are private between husband and wife, and didn't want to talk about it, and yet she still thinks she has information in oder to take actions and then make judgements? The ONE thing I said to her last summer was that she had NO CLUE (throught my massive hysteria) what I was dealing with and feeling. But she just can't accept that sometimes, when you don't know what you're talking about, what you need to do is shut up.

I'm really hurt and really sad. But I don't think I'm going to raid the candy aisle at CVS. So that's good.

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