LOL at that last part, Em, I personally was sitting around thinking about it, but I have always been a hyper-sexual person. Truly though, I have. I got a bit of a jump-start or something, with being younger than the people around me all the time. I was ahead in school. When I was in the 8th grade, I had a church boyfriend who was a sophomore. Years later, as an adult, I realized that in the 8th grade, I was 12, and I remember that Paul had a driver's license -- so he was 16; normal sophomore age! Holy crap. And though we never so much as even kissed, to me now, the thought of a 12 year old and a 16 year old, no matter how mature the 12 year old...OMG, you know? But it never even crossed my mind. It was a very innocent 'holding hands' short-term kind of relationship, but STILL! Then when I was a freshman, my boyfriend was a junior -- I was 13/14 that year, he was 17/18. Eek. I DO remember rounding...lemme see if I can remember what to call it...I guess, like, THIRD base there (only once, cause I was NOT ready and recognized it, and he was fortunately a respectful guy in that manner when I backed him off). BUT, all that said, I was a virgin until I was almost 17 (different boyfriend by then). And I was on birth control pills -- I could tell it was coming up in the particular relationship, and that I was on the cusp of switching to 'green light', so I had been for a couple months. Point being, I was on the pill -- BEFORE I was having sex! I never would have DREAMED ignoring that aspect and doing it, even then at the 'irresponsible' age of 16! Heck, even that same guy I lost my vg to at 16, I dated again as a young adult for a few years (23-24), and there was one time where things got really heavy and we got ahead of ourselves, but stopped and kinda both went 'WHOA, can NOT do that', and headed for the condoms. And we both had our own places, both had good jobs, were in our mid-20's, had known each other for years, etc. And still didn't take the chance.

We never talked about sex in my family growing up. My sex talk was once when I was helping my mother make her bed, I was 16, and she said (I quote directly) "If you ever think about having sex, don't because you'll regret it later". End quote. She made me read 'Where did I come from' to my baby brother when I was about 9 (I realized MUCH later that she was having me read it to myself, even though I'd already read the book -- I was only embarrassed because she was making me read it out loud "to him" and she was hanging around). I got busted with birthcontrol pills when I was a senior and my mom FLIPPED. She found a letter I'd written to the early high school sweetheart when we got back together toward the end of my senior year, referring to us having had sex. She freaked. Made me give her his parents phone number. Oh. It was SO humiliating. But the funny part was, HE wasn't the first, almost, but not. Odd thing too...I appealed to my DAD, the COLONEL, about getting me my stuff back (my pills and phone number book), and started to say 'you probably don't want to hear about this right now'; he actually stopped me and said it didn't concern him too much. I guess he was glad I had the pills...*shrug* All I know is that is shocked the hell out of me that he was so calm.

I'm realizing how much happened just before, during, and right after my senior year... Oh my...

I agree Em, about how non-chalant society has become a/b teenagers and pregnancy, and even young ladies in their early 20's. No one seems to bat an eyelash much at seeing a young woman, pregnant, without a wedding ring. I personally don't have an issue with single motherhood once you are a little older and financially responsible, etc. It's been an interesting experience watching my step daughter, who got pg at 18, and how no one really flinched. I remember thinking years ago, when most of my unmarried friends had a child or two, in my 20's, how when I was in highschool it made me an oddball to have parents that were still married; I realized that by the time that generation of little kids grew up, it was going to be strange to have parents that were EVER married! It was a really profound thought.

I know I'm rambling now, and this is barely relevant to the topic, I'm just remembering my own teenage years. I had a very important boyfriend when I was 17, started just before graduation, and it was one of those love at first sight things. And even now, at 31, I still believe it was. I can remember seeing him walk across the yard (it was a set-up, his friend and my friend arranged for us to meet), and it being magical. Still stands out as the only storybook love-at-first-sight experience of my life, even now as a married adult, and having been 'over him' for years and years. He was a year older, went to school nearby, my parents loved him, we were going to get married, he was going to (and did) join the army; we were REALLY serious REALLY fast, and not just in a sexual way. In that case only, we jointly decided that we weren't going to use birth control; sounds stupid, but it didn't seem right, with all our plans for the future, that pretty much involved getting me out of highschool, him into the army, and starting life together (including wanting a family as soon as possible). We decided that we could handle whatever happened, and we were planning to get married anyway, so...okay. Didn't get pg, by the way. Obviously. Oh, or married. LOL! Obviously. But I remember us making the decision together, verbally, conciously, having mature realistic discussions about it, not to TRY, but not to avoid it. We were both out of high school by then. Hmmm...interesting what takes you back...

Where you are and what kind of environment obviously makes a difference. I went to a middle class large public high school. I remember one girl pregnant during the year when I was a freshman, and being STUNNED, she was a senior. Then, when I was a junior, I think there was one in my grade level that I did know. Then, right before graduation, there was a girl who actually got married, and then pg, in that order. My friend was the only other one I knew at the time, and she was a senior, and had moved to a different high school by then, so I barely saw her. My friend Gail's sister in law was permitted to get married at 16, while they were both still in high school, and she WASN'T pg, but got that way soon after. She was like, 7 months along in their PROM picture. Precious, eh? And this was only about...7-8 years ago. No one has EVER figured that one out. And also Gail's cousin had just made HEAD CHEERLEADER for her senior year (HUGE big deal in Texas, and football, huge big deal), same high school Gail and I went to, and dropped out of school and got a GED because she got pg the summer before her senior year started. She married the guy and is still married, and this was...mmm...5 years ago? Maybe 6.

I guess the thing is, there doesn't seem to be a 'magic formula'. Obviously, demographics, and stuff like that make a difference, but there's just no perfect solution or explanation. *shrug*

I don't even remember what my senior song/saying/flower/whatever was...I'd have to look it up in MY YEARBOOK , if I can even find the dusty old thing...LOL!

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